These past few days have been a bit shaky. It’s easy to be over whelmed and undone. Here are a few suggestions to Keep Calm and Host.
I constantly have things on my heart that are almost too heavy to put into words. I believe God sees them. I believe He hears them. I believe He knows them long before I do. I believe in the power of prayer. I can see God’s hand in my life because of it. Mostly changing me instead of giving me what I thought was best.
2. Get Busy
For me, it’s best if I just keep moving forward. Because I DO believe that things will happen and I’d rather be ready for them then not. But I’ll admit, getting ready is the best way I know how to love my kids in this situation. I’m working hard for them, whether they ever get to experience that or not. If it helps my keep my sanity, that’s just a bonus.
3. Talk or Not
Like many marriages, I lean on the “verbal processing side” and my husband the “not so verbal side.” I’ve learned a lot from him. His logic keeps me grounded and there isn’t a day that goes by that I am not thankful for him. Sometimes, there just isn’t anything to talk about. If there isn’t any new information, if there isn’t anything we can do, if there anyplace to move the situation; I don’t want to beat it to death. It’s better for everyone if we don’t relive it. Updates are welcome, good or bad. But you can’t dig yourself out the bottom of a hole.
In Youth Group we do this thing called a trust fall. Kids fall backwards, off a ledge into a group of people, trusting that they will catch them. We often like to think we have things figured out and in control. But let’s face it; we’ve got nothing. It’s moments like these that force us to come face to face with our frailty. As much as you hate it – you know it’s good for you. It’s an opportunity to trust and fall. It’s also an opportunity to be caught, embraced and held.
5. Be Thankful
No matter how things end in life, whether I get the big prize or not; I have so much to be thankful for. There have been so many moments and memories that I will always treasure. They can never be taken away. I’ve changed too. I am extremely thankful for that. I see things I was blinded to before. I heart is bigger and softer. And I’ve found my mama bear growl. I am desperately thankful for each of these things a more.
6. Support the Troops
I know, you’re feeling defeating. I know you feel rundown and at a loss. Now think how others feel. People that chose this profession because it is their passion. People who have multiple families depending on them. Don’t underestimate what a message, text, or card can do. They are on the varsity. It’s our job to be the cheerleaders.
7. Create Memories
For months we weren’t sure we were going to be able to host a second time. It was devastating. Suddenly God got involved and a miracle happened that allowed us to. Since then I’ve allowed myself to create new memories. Meaning, I am so looking forward to times with them, I’ve played and replayed their reactions in my mind. Keeping my expectations low, but knowing my girls will love our time together, gives me motivation to keep going.
8. Ask for Help
I realized it was time to pull out the big guns. I asked our friends and family, basically everyone who’s ever heard of or met our girls, to pray. I alerted them to the need, some of the overall issues, and how we were doing with all of it. I know many of them spend time thinking of us and sending us “warm thoughts” and “hugs”. Coffee, prayer and friendship is a power team. Don’t underestimate it.
9. Keep the End in Mind
Just like labor pains, once they are over, they’re over. Your pain is suddenly replaced with a joy that stretches your heart to full capacity. This process is long and difficult at times. It can be hills and valleys of emotion. But in the end, all the aches of the journey won’t compare to the joy of the destination. Non of this stuff actually matters.
10. Shake It Off
Sometimes you have to let go. After one of the most stressful weekends of my life years ago – I yelled at the top of my lungs once I got out of the parking lot. Then I blasted the radio and let the music beat the tension out of me. I encourage you to do the same. Music is powerful – embrace it. Dance it out. Taylor Swift never actually hurt anyone. I promise, you’ll feel better, and I won’t tell anyone.